April 14, 2009

subway1Today marked the first time I forgot to bring my lunch and had no one to go to lunch with.  Accordingly, I ventured out on my own in search of sustenance and stumbled upon a Subway.  I imagine the feelings I experienced were a lot like Moses finally setting eyes upon the promised land, the only difference being I was allowed to go in.  Now, in order for me to properly and fully explain just how magnificent this Subway was compared to the one I had previously patronized, I must first explain just how awful the previous Subway was. 

To begin with, the last Subway was located on the Navy Yard, which is in many ways the kiss of death to begin with.  Because it’s on the Navy Yard, the only people they can count on eating there are the work week lunch time crowds.  As a result, the manager would only order enough food to last from 10 am (when they opened) to 1pm (when the lunch time rush ended).  This meant that if you arrived after 1pm then you were most likely out of luck, as all they were likely to have left were a few errant pieces of bologna (does Subway even serve bologna?  I think the manager just brought some from home), some of those weird peppers that no one eats, and a couple drops of one of their less popular sauces.  As for bread…Wheat.  The other major fault of this Subway was that since everyone ate at the same time, the lines were always incredibly long.  On average, there would be about thirty people waiting in line at one time to get their sandwich.  Now, you would think that since the manger knew that everyone would be lining up at the same time every day, that he would make sure to have everything ready to go, thereby ensuring prompt customer service.  Oh no.  Instead, what one got was a ragtag selection of people whose only goals in life were to work their way up from bread maker to fixens’ person, and even that was considered a stretch.  Sadly, I don’t think any words of mine can properly describe just how bad these people were at making sandwiches.  I’ll leave you with this one example and then move on:  One day, I shuffled up to the counter after having waited in line for 35 minutes and placed my order for a six inch tuna on italian.  At first I was informed that they didn’t have any italian.  OK, no problem.  How about Italian herbs and cheese?  You have that?  Great!  My sandwich then worked its way down the line until the person was ready to begin the intricate origami-like wrapping when I asked if they intended to put any tuna in the bread.  Oh, you wanted tuna on that?  No, I was really in the mood for two slices of bread with some lettuce between them. 

Now that you have an appreciation for just how bad the Navy Yard subway is, you can better understand my excitement at finding a subway run by competent people.  All I’ll say in favor of my new Subway is this:  It’s a good thing I order the same thing every single time (going on 9 years now – 6″ tuna on italian, american cheese, lettuce, bannana peppers, and mayo – try it, you’ll love it) because I didn’t even have time to think between the different sandwich making stations.  The entire process from, “I’d like…” to, “thank you” literally lasted less than 1 minute.  It was the happiest sandwich day of my life.


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