Archive for May, 2010

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A tribute to XKCD.com

May 24, 2010

Making this flowchart reduced my comic reading to seven hours

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Condoms!

May 21, 2010

I’ve always disliked the Washington Examiner for its overly sensational and misleading headlines that get conservatives riled up and angry, but I think today’s headline made up for years of questionable reporting:

“DC Teens wanter bigger, better condoms”

The Express also had a pretty good article about the same thing, the best part of which is watching other people read a full page spread (hehehe…spread) about condoms while trying to look professional.  Here are some of the better quotes:

“High School students have complained that the free condoms the city offers are not of good enough quality and are too small, and that getting them from school nurses ‘was just like asking grandma or Auntie.’ ”

“D.C. officials have now decided to stock up on Trojan brand condoms and the supersized Trojan ‘Magnum’ product, and have begun to authorized teachers or counselors, preferably males, to distribute condoms to students if they complete a 30-minute, online training course called ‘Wrap MC’ – for ‘Master of Condoms.’ ”

“We thought making condoms available was a good thing, but we never asked the kids what they wanted.”

“The gold package certainly has a little bit of the bling quality.”

Is it just me, or does this policy seem to be a form of government support for the stereotype that black men have huge penises?  I mean, these are high school kids and they’re complaining that the free, normal sized condoms are too small?  You’ll notice how Bethesda doesn’t seem to have this problem…

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Happy Birthday to me!

May 20, 2010

Today’s my birthday! Yippee!  That’s means it’s one of two days of the year I allow myself to buy the most decadent breakfast pastry ever devised.  Frequent readers of this blog will immediately realize I’m writing about the exact same thing I wrote about one year ago when I raved about the breakfast pastries they sell at the bakery near my office.  They’re so good that I only allow myself to buy them on two occasions:  My birthday, and the anniversary of when I started this job.  One’s in celebration, the other, well, that depends on the budget. 

Unfortunately, I had an early morning meeting today that threatened to ruin my plans, but, not to be deterred, I got to work a half hour early to ensure I would have time to enjoy my breakfast pastry and coffee.  And guess what…it was just as good as I remember!  Ahh…birthdays… 🙂

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Save some for the rest of us!

May 14, 2010

This morning on the metro there was an old, sketchy, mean-loooking guy sitting across from me.   As the train arrived at King Street a reasonably attractive woman who was significantly younger than the old guy got on the train and sat down next to him, at which point he proceeded to STARE DIRECTLY AT HER.  He turned his head and blatantly checked her out, starting with her chest, then her legs, then her face.  Thankfully, she got off at the next stop but that didn’t stop ol’ laser eyes from using his entire head to follow her as she walked off the train.  Now, I’m not one to shy away from looking at an attractive woman on the metro, but for god’s sake, use a little subtlety!  Do you really need to move your entire head?  Learn to use your peripherals!  And if out of sheer luck an attractive woman happens to sit next to you, don’t ruin it for the rest of us!  And in case you were wondering, yes, the sketchy old guy had with him a copy of the Examiner.